Note: I decided not to run last week’s
cartoon because it was just too stupid.
Artist's Statement
Ever since the election I have lost all
interest in politics, and it's been a struggle to come
up with any topical cartoons. This week a friend started
complaining to me this week about
how
this Illinois
gubernatorial
imbroglio is only the start of another eight-year-long
relentless Republican search for some Whitewater/ Lewinski/
Whatever scandal to cripple or destroy Obama's Presidency,
and I all but made the international yap-yap-yap
gesture
at her. I am so, like, Whatever, dude. All I ever wanted
was to have someone who wasn't unrepentantly evil or
functionally retarded in the oval office. Currently the
only news story in the world that interests me is whether
Muntader Al-Zaidi, the journalist who threw his shoes
at Geroge Bush, gets out of jail.
This will be the first in an intermittent
series of commemorative portraits of the Bush Administration.
I am indebted for this portrait to my old Jägerbuddy
Elena, who, after Condoleezza Rice’s appearance
at the 9/11 commission’s hearings, described her
as “The Angriest Little Princess in Storybookland.” In
fact I began to write this very caption out in that elaborate
gothic script that is so time-consuming, but then decided
that the sparkly little tiara and dress and scepter pretty
much said it all. Condoleezza Rice has been much doted
upon by the media, mostly because she is pretty (by Washington,
D.C. standards, meaning presentable on camera). She's
reknowned for her talent as a classical pianist, but
the fucking Nazis were cultured. She may be working on
Brahms’s Second Piano Concerto but she'd have an
easier time with those octaves and sixths and tricky
rhythms without all that blood on her fingers. She’s
generally accounted one of the smartest people in Washington,
which means about as much as being called a “genius” in
Hollywood. A reputation for intelligence is not exactly
hard to come by in a business in which people like Newt
Gingrich and Grover Norquist are considered your deep
thinkers.
Condoleezza, in turn, once called George
Bush one of the most intelligent men she’d ever
met, which would be an astonishing statement coming from
pretty much anybody outside of Texas, let alone someone
who’s had the opportunity to meet people like Nelson
Mandela. Rice apparently has a history of attaching herself
to powerful male mentors and then thinking exactly what
those men think, adopting their worldviews and ideologies,
a more insidious and contemptible kind of intellectual
toadyism than honest sycophancy. If she is in fact intelligent,
she is way more culpable for the atrocities of the Bush
Administration than if she were an idiot, because she’s
willfully submitted her own intellectual powers to the
mind and will of a man far stupider than she. The notorious,
mortifying moment when she referred to George Bush as "my
husband" suggests there may be more than a fundamental
weak-mindedness or unresolved father-figure issues at
work here. She's abetted the
deaths of hundreds
of thousands of civilians and made
the United States the single most hated
nation on earth for her boyfriend.
For all her supposed integrity and smarts she’s
a liar and a fool, a shivering toy poodle
in the lap of a
child despot.
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