Below is the latest The Pain -- When Will It
It's funny: the Mr. Tehn cartoons are like the
W______s cartoons; I never know whether they're funny or
any good or what to think of them at all until I read the reactions
from readers. I'm always ashamed whenever I resort to running
a W_______s cartoon, and yet
I do the same friends, including my
colleague Emily Flake, the novelist Jenny Boylan, and my racquetball
partner Jesse Fuchs, predictably write in to express their
delight (except for
me know that, no mattter what anyone else says, the W______s
suck ass). And people seem to adore Mr. Tehn with an almost
As Jenny wrote me this week: "Now hear this. I want all future
comics from the Pain to feature Mr. Tehn. Clearly, you have
hit upon a deep deep vein here. He is me, and we are all him.
I cannot speak of him any more. But I want to
Last week I was walking near Lincoln Center when I saw a hulking black homeless man with only a few crooked teeth left sticking out of his head slumped on a bank's windowsill, holding out a paper cup and groaning the word "CHANGE... CHANGE... CHANGE..." over and over, tonelessly, like a broken automaton. As I walked past him it occurred to me: "If that was the Frankenstein monster instead of a person sitting there begging for change, your heart would be riven with sympathy. You would give him a thousand dollars to buy himself a new suit and get a good meal and set him up in a nice hotel for the night. Why is a homeless monster sadder than a homeless human being?" I went back and gave him a dollar. His face lit up. He said, "Hey! Thanks, Chief!"
I love it when people call me chief.