Below is the latest The Pain -- When Will It End?
Updated 6/02/04

Artist's Statement

This one came out of a conversation I had with Dave Israel over breakfast at Cross Street market last Monday morning. Originally I was thinking that it might be time for another "Operation: ________" cartoon, one in which I would 1.) go out with Jenna in New York City, 2.) get her wasted, and 3.) get one of my drawings of her father, probably the one showing him plastered and with a little paper cocktail umbrella stuck behind his ear, tattooed on her ass. But ultimately we realized that a far more elegant and torturous punishment for her father waould be this scenario. Note the brand of cigars.

Well, obviously this cartoon is unfair, irrelevant, silly, mean-spirited, completely below the belt. So fucking what. Making fun of someone's daughter is pretty trivial compared to sending their children to Iraq to get dismembered and killed for lies, for absolutely nothing. Anything I can do in print to humiliate or belittle this President, anything to make him seem ridiculous and contemptible, I will do. The entire Bush family line should be exiled to Pakistan, to ensure that none of that vicious runty brood ever get their greedy hands on political power in this country again.

Party Report:

It is, perhaps, a mercy that those who did not attend the book release party for The Pain--When Will It End? will never even understand how stunted and lustreless and without meaning their lives are. The consensus is that it was the most fun anyone present had ever had. Everyone found everyone else to be hilarious. The books sold out. I was presented with a work of art stolen from an eight-year-old and an enormous rusted sling blade. Zero Benjamen unexpectedly flew in from Boston. My beloved groupie Alicia wore a white slip decorated with silkscreens of my drawings of my own face. (The cartoon "Sodomy Legalized" was over her ass.) Boyd White wore an Arab headdress and a T-shirt that said, "FUCK TIM KREIDER!" He told the novelist Myla Goldberg that he loved her breasts. Alicia did a lascivious dance to "Let's Go Crazy" with Deborah, whom I fear, so outraging the local ladies that they were forced to tear off their own shirts in an effort to wrench attention back to themselves. I kissed the lovely French Isabelle. Steve and Myra and Jenny and I slapped each other hard, again and again, and Myra said it was the happiest she had been since the day she married Steve. We wept with laughter. Alicia, Jenny, and my colleague Emily all made out in the ladies' room. There were tiny meatballs. And, most importantly of all, what has until now been the entirely theoretical Coattail Effect was proven beyond a doubt to exist. And that was only the first night.


Photo 1- (L-R) Dave Israel, Boyd White, Alicia Miziolek, Tim Kreider,Jennifer Boylan, Randy Gardener
standing in for Jim Fisher, and (Front) Chris re-enact the invitation behind Cox's Pub.


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