It occurred to recently that I face this dilemma
in the November election: if Bush wins (which I'm afraid I consider likely),
I may have to saw my own head off, but if Kerry wins, The Pain's
present incarnation as a political cartoon will have lost its raison d'etre.
I'll be like Vaughan Meader after Kennedy was shot (of whom if you have not
heard there's a reason).
On this subject, I have perhaps unwisely pledged to raise $1000.00 for MoveOn.org, the internet-organized PAC that keeps airing insulting campaign ads about George Bush. It's not, as this cartoon illustrates, like I am all fired up about Kerry's candidacy, but the prospect of making that simpering little liar Bush a one-term loser like his daddy is well worth over a thousand dollars to me. If you join me in thrilling vengefully to the thought of Bush being forcibly dragged out of the White House--hopefully crying and clutching feebly at the doorway--why not donate whatever you can afford to this cause. I will post details as soon as I get them from MoveOn.org.
I think the dialogue here is self-explanatory but, for the curious, the translation is:
"Six more beers, please."
"Six more, mister?"
"...and ouzo! Yes--much ouzo..."
There are actually two different versions of this cartoon: the Greek one you see here and a Spanish-language version ("Muy MUY TEQUILA..."). It was only after I'd e-mailed in the later that I realized that, in the event of a Bush victory, I would really rather go back to Greece, where I spent a very pleasant two months in 1995 until I got stabbed in the throat. Also, the Greek alphabet looks cool. Luckily the topographies are similar so I didn't have to re-draw the backgrounds. I wasn't certain which version to post on the website but the issue was decided by my webmaster Dave, who believes the kid's hair in the Greek version is hilarious. The boy has a raggedy bowl haircut in the Spanish version. Why Dave considers curly hair funny I don't know. What my art director at the Baltimore City Paper had to say was, "I'd like to see a fatter ass on the Greek chick, but that's just me."
Of course if Bush wins the election I will not really go to Greece or any other island paradise. I will stay on here, watching helplessly as what was once America turns into a dystopian police state out of one of Philip K. Dick's paranoid fantasies, drawing ever darker, more brutal and humorless cartoons and drinking myself into blessed unconsciousness daily, becoming an angry, bitter little man with a heart full of hate.
Fuckin' waminalz, man.
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