2 December 2005

Esteemed artist,

Sadly, your webmaster did not update this week's cartoon.  Since the Baltimore City Paper has done such an execrable job of late printing your fine art work, I have had to rely on the "Internet" to assauge my viewing/reading pleasure craving. Alas, no new cartoon this week.  No witty repartee between "Les amis de Kreider."  No poignant angst filled missive evoking man's sense[less] plight.  ONLY LAST WEEK'S CARTOON!  Why, why this sad lapse in my trusted source of entertainment? Has the creeping imbecility that devours of noble land finally claimed my cherished psalmist?  Have Bob Dylan's prophetic words, uttered in 1976, finally come true: "It's a wonder that we still know how to breathe?" (Sorry for the placement of the question mark inside the quote, but Strunk and White made me do it). 

Can you offer some solice to this nighted soul? Can I have this one simple pleasure restored?

Please help!


J. H. D.

Jeff D.:

You will find the drawing of this week updated.

Mr. Kreider points out that Strunk and White dictate that a comma should be placed inside the quotations when the quotation is followed of an attributive clause.  He doubts that very vigorously whether a question mark is treated similarly where it seems to change the significance of the quotation.

Also it is "solace."

English is not my birth tongue so I defer to Mr. Kreider on these matters.



7 December 2005

Hello Ms. Phelatia Czochula-Hautpanz!

I was wondering what the requirements were for becoming a groupie for Tim Kreider? Other then a female of course (as seems to be his usual sexual preference) and luckily that I'm young but still legal?

Also, please send Tim my gratitude for his comics, and especially the "artistic statements" that go along with them. :0)  I'd say "yay for cynicism" but somehow it seems a bit ironic, but hey, irony is a great thing. so, "yay!"

from one supposed artist to another,


ps: I sincerely apologize for my not including pictures of my "boobies," though obviously not quite enough to include said pitures anyways, but hopefully this will not hurt my "groupie" application, as I can assure that they are quite nice.


It is an ideal time for Mr. Kreider to receive new a groupie as he is currently "down in the dumpster" for a variety of reasons, extending from the failure of his book to the cold of encroachment.  He will be very eager to hear that you are a young person as many women that are his own age are rabid for the babies.  Photographs of the breasts are not necessary (Mr. Kreider he is a man of ass of the higher order in any event) but perhaps have you photographs of yourself to subject?  I will dispatch then the latter to Mr. Kreider. Please do not be an alienated person as Mr. Kreider has resolved no longer to liaise with the mentally unsound.

Mr. Kreider often wonders that people find his drawings cynical.  With him they seem simply realistic. He will appreciate your cheers.